Who will cry when you die?

Self help book written by Robin Sharma guiding how to live more meaningful life.- ⭐⭐

• Book written by Robin Sharma
• Started : 07th Oct, 2024 - Finished : 05th Jan, 2025

Notable lines

Pg.6-7 A beautiful story about two patients in hospital.

Pg.8 We walk this planet for such a short time. In the overall scheme of things, our lives are mere blips on the canvas of eternity.

Pg.10 Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not. - Thomas Henry Huxley

Pg.15 When we promise someone you will do something, do it. Be a person of your word rather than being "all talk and no action".

Pg.17 It is better by noble boldness to run the risk of being subject to half of the evils we anticipate than to remain cowardly listlessness for fear of what may happen.- Herodotus

Pg.22 If your priorites don't get scheduled into your planner, other people's priorities will get put into your planner.

Pg.22 Story by Chinese sage Chuang-tzu of a man who forged swords for a Maharaja

Pg.25 Stress itself is not a bad thing. It can often help us perform at our best, expand beyond our limits and achieve things that would otherwise astonish us. Just ask any athlete. The real problem lies in the fact that in this age of global anxiety we do not get enough relief from stress

Pg.34 But our thoughts do form our world and what we think about grow in our lives. What we focus on will determine our destiny and so we must start focussing on the good stuff.

Pg.34 Take the time to study positive qualities of children and model their ability to stay energized, imaginative and completely in the moment no matter what might be going on around them.

Pg.38 Those who don't make time for exercise must eventually make time for illness.

Pg.39 The act of caring for my physical temple(ie. body) reminds me that life's greatest pleasures are often life's simplest ones.

Pg.40 Story of Lighthouse keeper.

Pg.45 During the free time she found she had created, she would do all the things she loved to do but had somehow never found time for.

Pg.49 According to one study, the average four-year-old laughs 300 times a day, while the average adult laughs about 15 times a day.

Pg.49 William James, the father of modern psychology, observed, "We don't laugh because we are happy. We are happy because we laugh."

Pg.64 I promised myself that I would commit myself to eliminating the multitude of distractions in my life and concentrate on only the fundamentals, those few activities that really had the power to make a difference in the way I worked and lived. I promised to stop reading 6 newspapers a day, handling every piece of mail that appeared in my in-basket and accepting every dinner invitation that came my way.

Pg.64 The person who tries to do everything ultimately achieves nothing. - The monk who sold his Ferrari

Pg.64 The real secret to getting things done is knowing what things need to be left undone.

Pg.65 The sage Confucius put it this way, "The person who chases two rabbits catches neither", while the Roman philosopher Marcus Aurelius said, " Let thine occupations be few if thou wouldst lead a tranquil life."

Pg.69 And the person you will be 5 years from now will come down to two primary influences: the people you associate with and the books you read.

Pg.77 Winston Churchill once said, "It helps me to write down half a dozen things which are worrying me. Two of them, say, disappear; about two, nothing can be done, so it's no use worrying; and two perhaps can be settled."

Pg. 116 As novelist Saul Bellow once observed, "A clear plan relieves you of the torment of choice"

Pg. 116 If you set goals, the actions you take will be based on your life's mission rather than on your day-to-day moods.

Notes

• This looks to be another self-help book but not the traditional one. It is 3rd installment in the series of "The Monk who sold his Ferrari" by the author.
• The book start with the theme of "How to live your life well", "How to find our calling".
• Carrying on the same theme of living our life well, the author asks to be kind to a stranger in second chapter. Examples he give for showing kindness/compassion to strangers are- Paying the toll for person in the car behing us(which is really stupid!), offering our seat to someone in need in subway, being the first to say hello.
• In the third chapter, the author recalls a story about two patients in a hospital, where a patient by the window always used to tell another patient of the various beautiful things out of the window. The other patient initially loving the conversation grew jealous with time, thinking that the patient by the window is mocking him. One day, when patient by the window stopped breathing, then the other patient instead of calling for help let him die out of jealousy. He later discovers that ouside the window was a Brick wall-No view. This tells us about "Perspective". To live happier, We should be searching for a more enlightened perspective in difficult circumstatnces(seemingly negative situations) of our lives.
• The author later on discusses Self Discipline to live a successful and meaningful life. Also we should be maintaining journal. And there is a stark difference between Diary and Journal. Diary is record of everyday events whereas Journal is a place where we analyze and evaluate those events.
• Next the author asks is, for us to be honest. Honest in what we say,that is always fullfilling what we say. If we promise someone something, Do it. He asks us to do a 7 days "Truth Fast", where we vow to be honest in all our dealings with others.
• Author tells to learn from the past but not to dwell in it. Also, don't let the things that we wish never happened to us block the things we want to happen from entering our lives.
• Coming to Chapter-8, Author tells the importance of first 30 mins of day when we wake up. He call that time The Platinum 30. Author asks us to spend this 30 mins very judicioulsy to start the day well. He spends it 15 mins of it by silent contemplation and then reading books(He calls it wisdom literature) like meditating, reading books like "Meditations" by Roman philosopher Marcus Aurelius, "The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin" and "Walden" by Henry David Thoreau.
• Chapter-9 is a real treasure. Author highlights the importance of saying No gracefully. If we say yes to every agenda and requests that come to us, that simple reflects that the priorities of our life are unclear. He says, If your priorites don't get scheduled into your planner, other people's priorities will get put into your planner. The solution to this problem is to be clear about our life's objectives and then to learn to say no with grace. Saying No is the start to a Better self because then we can remove all distractions and focus on what matters most to us, in builiding ourself, in enhancing our expertise of the high impact activites of our life. He tells us a story by Chinese sage Chuang-tzu of a man who forged dwords for a maharaja. Even at the age of 90, his work was carried our with exceptional precision and ability. One day when Maharaja asked the old man about the secret behing remarkable result (that is sword) whether his natural talent or some special technique, he answered, "Concentration on the essentials". He said, "I took to forging swords when I was 21 years old. I did not care about anything else. If it is not a sword, I did not look at it or pay any attention to it. Forging swords became my passion and my purpose. I took all the energy that I did not give in other directions and put it in the direction of my art. This is the secret to my mastery."
• Author says, most effective persons concentrate on their "areas of excellence", that is, on the things they do best and on those high-impact activities that will advance their lifework. They are so consumed by important things, they find it easy to say "No" to less-than-worthy distractions that clamor for their attentions.
• Author gives examples as well-
  • Michael Jordan focussed only on this basketball game and not Contract negotiations or designs of his uniforms or preparing his travel schedules.
  • Jazz great Louis Armstrong focussed on playing the trumpet, that his point of brilliance, and not on selling his tickets to his shows. The essence is, Learning to say 'No' to non-essential things will give us more time to devoted things that have power to improve the way we live.
• In the 10th chapter, author asks us to take Weekly sabbatical (break). Stress itself is not a bad thing. It can often help us perform at our best, expand beyond our limits and achieve things that would otherwise astonish us. Just ask any athlete. The real problem lies in the fact that in this age of global anxiety we do not get enough relief from stress. It doesn't need to last a day, instead it can last few hours. During that we can spend time in our favorite bookstore, watch the sunrise, take a solitary walk along a beach or write in our journal.
• In next chapter, author tells a technique to repeat a phrase to ourselves atleast 200 times a day for atleaset 4 weeks. This will improve the quality of our lives and will bring more peace, prosperity and purpose. Ex. If I want more confidence in my life then I can use the phrase- I am delighted that I am full of confidence and boundless courage. or If I want material prosperity, I can say the phrase- I am so grateful that money and opportunity is flowing in my life.
• Then, author talks about way of reducing worry by scheduling "Worry break" every day for half an hour (and then gradually eliminating worry and so the break). If some new topic comes to my mind causing stress/worry, then it can be jotted down so that it can be worried upon during the "Worry break session".
• Next chapter, talks about learning from a child. He recalled visit to a restaurant with his 4 years old child. When he was having bread, then he ate the soft part leaving the hard crust part. This behavious of child has very profound and inspirational meaning for grown-ups. It talks about connecting to the playful side of us, like a child. No matter what is going around with us, we should always stay energized and completely in the moment.
• Author tells about the importance of Physical exercise. He uses the work "Temple" for our physical body, emphasizing how sacred our physical health and body is. Other than physical benefits, It acts as stress-buster, helps us to think clearly and also boosts creativity.
  • Those who don't make time for exercise must eventually make time for illness.
  • The act of caring for my physical temple(ie. body) reminds me that life's greatest pleasures are often life's simplest ones.
• Chapter 16 asks us to arrange little time for us to be silent, to reflect. He tells us the story of Lighthouse keeper who had limited oil for the lighthouse beacon. Whoever came to him asking for some oil with some reason, he would give part of his oil. Later, he didn't have oil for the light-house, which caused several ships to run aground resulting in several lives lost. * He neglected his primary duty, and paid high price.* So the author says, if he had arranged for a little time of solitude for even a few minutes a day, his highest life priorities would have been centered.
• Chapter 17 is classical self-help bullshit, asking us to make a list of people(authors or any other personality) who we wish could be our neighbors.
• Author tells that sleeping early ie. 5 AM is one success principle really worth integrating into life. By this, we will get free time we didn't know exist in our life. Also few tips to sleep more deeply is-
  • Don't rehearse activities of day while lying on bed for sleep.
  • Don't eat after 8 PM (If you have to eat something, have soup)
  • Don't watch news before you go to sleep.
  • Don't read in bed.
• Chapter 26 asks us to focus our day on just "worthy things" and eliminate the multitude of distractions.
• Chapter 29 asks us to create a Love Account in bank where we make few deposits each day. Use the money in this account to buy fresh cut flowers for your partner, sending your best friend a copy of your favorite book, etc.
• It might be a coincidence, but the Chapter-36 is , "Read Tuesdays with Morrie", book which I read before reading this present book. Anyway, not exactly a coincidence, once I was browsing Amazon for Tuesdays with Morrie (The title captivated me to buy the book), and after buying that book, I got the recommendation to buy this present book, "Who will cry when you die." Notes on Tuesdays with Morrie
• Chapter-80 discusses the power of remaining silent. Often times, people talk more than they have to. This is a lack of discipline. Discipline involves saying what needs to be said and preserving your precious mental energy by not talking more than you have to. We should also keep a vow of silence for one hour daily over next seven days. Don't speak during silent time. Or if you must, speak only in direct response to a question and offer a clear, crisp answer rather than rattling on about everything from what was on TV last night to where you hope to vacation this summer.

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